ATTENTION, semi drunken posting

red lipstick impressions.

from my vista, I am at eyeline with the chandeliers, blue light, blue ice, from me to the stage.

and this big, big voice, fills the auditorium, and with it in a slow wave of memories. me at 17, losing my shirt in the mosh pit at the red hot chili peppers, losing my cookies in the safeway parking lot, before the earthquake.

sundry shows between
and then

Rufus, hitting on my then husband backstage, and my intense discomfort until this great big nasally voice fills and fills and all is forgiven.

since then, there have been other times and other venues.

Tonight from the balcony, blue, blue electric blue chandeliers. That voice.
Tonight from the balcony, they are bobbing and swaying or standing stock still. There are voices rising, between the music, there are snatches of conversation, there is the missed connection. There are the songs that are sung, and those unsung. There is Emma dancing.

there is Emma dancing, lyrics on her lips, music in her hips. There is P in tears, there is M with his arms about her shoulders. They have each other, we have nothing but the promise of a snatch of a song. So Emma and I dance, we are all swizzle, we marvel at the flexibility of our joints.

And for the first time we don't cry.

"Now I've heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don't really care for music, do you?
It goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Hallelujah

Your faith was strong but you needed proof
You saw her bathing on the roof
Her beauty and the moonlight overthrew her
She tied you
To a kitchen chair
She broke your throne, and she cut your hair
And from your lips she drew the Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

You say I took the name in vain
I don't even know the name
But if I did, well really, what's it to you?
There's a blaze of light
In every word
It doesn't matter which you heard
The holy or the broken Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah

I did my best, it wasn't much
I couldn't feel, so I tried to touch
I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool you
And even though
It all went wrong
I'll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah

Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Hallelujah, Hallelujah
Halleluja"


and don't let anyone tell you any different, there are angels in the strangest places. In a smoky beam of light, in the voice of a poncey queen, in the riddle of a lover, in a hand stamp, an empty glass.

in an empty bed, a hard place, an idling taxi, a whiff of a stranger who said that my earrings caught the light.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Captain

Rufus sings "halleluja" and it makes us happy.